Forcing myself to reflect and get my thoughts on ‘paper’ has allowed me to find my voice.
Creating discipline and a challenging routine is always extremely eye-opening to how many excuses I’ve given myself to not stay accountable.
I’m no one special. If I can stick to a plan, anyone can.
And that’s where I started catching myself judging others for not being able to stick to a routine, or wishing and hoping for things to be different..whatever the case may be.
My skin crawls and my face is doing the ‘sucking a lemon’ facial expression thinking about it.
Who am I to judge? 21 days ago I struggled with spitting words out onto a screen because I didn’t know how to put what I stood for on paper.
I caught myself typing ‘people tend to’…or ‘we need to change this’..or ‘they say this’.
And when I turned it to ‘I tend to’…’I need to change this’…or ‘I say this’…the context of my post 180 degrees changed. It was honestly shocking how much the post changed.
I was judging people without having my own shit together! What the f*ck?? And if I don’t have my own shit together, how the actual f*ck am I supposed to grow?
As queasy as this experience is, I’m really grateful to continue on. It’s been enlightening, to say the least, and I’m proud of myself for being extremely honest with myself and intentions.
Until tomorrow.